Note from Joe: This poem has spread all around the world in many different versions, and is always credited to “Anonymous”. However, the actual author is Gene Ziegler, to whom we all owe a debt of thanks for this clever and very funny poem.
If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash,
And the double-clicking icons put your window in the trash,
And your data is corrupted ’cause the index doesn’t hash,
Then your situation’s hopeless, and your system’s gonna crash!
If the label on your cable on the table at your house,
Says the network is connected to the button on your mouse,
But your packets want to tunnel by another protocol
That’s repeatedly rejected by the printer down the hall,
And your screen is all distorted by the side effects of gauss,
So your icons in the window are as wavy as a souse,
Then you may as well reboot and go out with a bang,
’Cause as sure as I’m a poet, the sucker’s gonna hang!
When the copy of your floppy’s getting sloppy on the disk,
And the microcode instructions cause unnecessary RISC,
Then you have to flash your memory and you’ll want to RAM your ROM:
Quickly turn off your computer and be sure to tell your mom!